reflecting

While Janine was here, I had the pleasure of hearing her speak to the Wired group about her work with Nuru which was #1 - just great and #2 - a challenge for me to find and pursue the things I am passionate about and allow God to show me who He has made me so that I can better serve Him. It would be easy (and is much of the time!) to wish that I had Janine's (or someone else's) life, or gifting, or abilities, but instead I am trying to learn to tap into my Creator and allow Him to show me how He has made me unique. Janine shared a favorite quote of mine during her talk:

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

I have seen this principle at work in Janine's life through the amazing things she has been able to do by utilizing and embracing the talents that God has given her, but it is something I struggle with in my own life. I have always been taught that humbleness is paramount, but sometimes I think I take that a step too far. I still don't want to brag about myself but often I also shy away from "bragging" about what God is doing with me. I also have a hard time recognizing my gifts because it's hard for me to say I'm "good" at something.

Today as I was reflecting on all of this, a song written by Brent Jackson (a super talented musician who interns and leads worship at our church), ironically called "Reflecting", came to mind. If you want to hear the entire song you can do so here, but the chorus is what struck me:

"So if you ever thought you've seen a light in me//He is reflecting//The sun shines on the moon and me//The beauty comes in the reflecting."

This got me thinking that when I hide or deny the gifts God has given me, I dampen the light that He is trying to reflect through my life. That still doesn't mean that I know what all my gifts are, but it does mean I want to be able to be open to God showing me those things as well as how to acknowledge and use them for His glory. Here's to reflecting a tiny piece of the beauty and nature of our infinite God and allowing Him to shine through me in both my weaknesses and my strengths.