new addition to the rickard family...

No, despite the current pregnancy craze among everyone I know, that's not the kind of addition I'm talking about....We got a dog! He is a rescue from the animal shelter named Schroeder and he's 10 weeks old. Check out all his cute-ness below:

unsettled

Big things are happening these days... exciting things, amazing things. They seem to be happening all around me to people I really care about and while I am so happy and excited for them, I can't help but feel a little twinge of... jealousy? desire? discontent? Here's the thing: I want to be doing something I really love, something I am passionate about and that I know is making an impact for Christ. The question I keep asking myself is: Is that where med school is going to get me or am I going to get to the end of this long process and wish I had done something else? I truly felt like this was where God was leading me and yet it is so hard and miserable and unenjoyable most of the time that it makes me wonder why God wouldn't call me to something that I really love. I know this life is about laying down my own life in order to pursue what God has for me (and maybe the misery is just part of class and not medicine itself) and yet it seems so much harder to lay down your life for endless studying, constant stress and missing out on so much time with friends and family than to lay it down for a big adventure. It seems harder to trust God's provision when you could just work and be equally dissatisfied than as when you are traveling across the world or getting to share with others something you are completely passionate about and sold out for. Maybe this is just a little discouragement talking or maybe everyone feels this way, but it is getting increasingly hard to miss out on things I do care about and enjoy to do something I don't and on top of it all, to continually question what my true strengths and gifts are and how they can be used. It is difficult to understand why God would take me away from something I was good at to do something I'm not so good at. I don't have any less confidence that God has a plan for me, I am just wondering and questioning what it is, which I think is all a part of the pursuing process. So here I am: pursuing, questioning, wondering, maybe wandering and trying to figure it all out, one step of faith at a time.

their welfare is ours

I have been reading Jeremiah lately and despite having a gnarly call (you can read about it but basically Jeremiah gets to deliver mostly bad news, is told by God not to pray for the people he is prophesying to and is threatened with death several times not to mention beaten and put in prison) he speaks the truth of God, no matter what the consequences. He is called to tell Israel that they would be going into exile in Babylon as punishment for their rebellion against God. Then, he is called by God to speak to those who are in exile and I think what he has to say is interesting:

"...seek the welfare of the city where I have sent you into exile, and pray to the Lord on its behalf, for in its welfare you will find your welfare." Jeremiah 29:7

God doesn't ask the Israelites to simply be content with the place He has sent them into exile, He asks them to INVEST there even while waiting for their return to their own country. This passage really hit me...How often am I content with where I am but looking ahead to what's next instead of taking time to invest in the place that God has put me? Even more importantly, how often am I investing in my city, in those outside my church or Christian community?

Lately, God has given me the privilege to witness the power of this type of investment. We (meaning members of my community and I) have taken advantage of the opportunity over the last several weeks to visit the Rail Trail here in Morgantown and just hang out with and get to know some of the people who call it or the Bartlett House their home. It started out with just a few of us, but as the group has grown it has been awesome just watching people fall in love with people. I think too often we separate ourselves from those who suffer because we don't know how to deal with the suffering. What I've learned from some of my friends on the Rail Trail is that, suffering or not, they just want to be treated as people instead of problems. While they appreciate the physical resources that are provided for them, they appreciate even more being able to tell their stories, voice their concerns and have people actually listen, invest, and care... And we should care...Why?

Because their welfare is ours.

Because their problems are ours.

Because their hurt is ours.

We simply cannot know the injustice and hurt that happens around us and not invest in the solution. And God asks us to invest in the place where He has put us, whether we like that place or not. The Israelites were asked to invest in their city of exile...Will you invest in your city?

hands and feet

God has been dealing with me a lot lately about the practicality of faith and about what role our works have in faith. It's a tough subject to wrap your mind around and I think I still have more questions than answers, to be honest. Like I said in my last post, I have been reading Shane Claiborne's book Irresistable Revolution (it's a great book but don't read it unless you are ready for it to ruin your life...in a good way...ha). There are so many aspects of the book I could talk about but one of the things that has hit me the hardest about it is a particular passage:

"I remember hearing about an old comic strip...Two guys are talking to each other, and one of them says he has a question for God. He wants to ask why God allows all of this poverty and war and suffering to exist in the world And his friend says, 'Well, why don't you ask?' The fellow shakes his head and says he is scared. When his friend asks why, he mutters, 'I'm scared God will ask me the same question.' Over and over, when I ask God why all of these injustices are allowed to exist in the world, I can feel the Spirit whisper to me, 'You tell me why we allow this to happen. You are my body, my hands, my feet.'"

Wow...That really shifts the responsibility doesn't it? So I have been contemplating what it looks like for me to be the hands and feet of Jesus in my particular situation and place in life. This is a huge struggle for me because I constantly want to be DOING something big for God. I want to be doing whatever it is He has for me, making a tangible and visible difference, living out a dream that God has given me and that I am passionate about, especially when I see other people in my life living the fulfillment of that (like my friend Janine....check out more at www.nuruinternational.org). And yet I can't help but wonder whether God is looking back at my frustration and saying "But what are you doing NOW? You want to do something tangible, so do it!" I think this is a trap so many of us fall into...We are pursuing and loving Christ and yet it doesn't seem to translate into our actions and thus our impact because we are waiting for THE thing God has for us instead of looking for what we can do now and realizing that THE thing that we are looking for may look different in every stage of our life. Again, I am still trying to flush this all out and I don't have all the answers, but what I do now is that I don't want to be a stagnant Christian. I don't want to get so caught up in my own life that I don't see the injustice, the poverty, the problems around me. And I want to do more than just profess Christ...I want to live Him.