it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas

Christmastime is here again somehow. Once again, the year has flown by but 2008 has been one of the most eventful years of my existence for sure (more blogging about that later). One of the big events was buying a house and I love being able to decorate it (instead of a tiny apartment) for the holidays. We even have a real tree! Just a few pics of the beautiful tree below. More blogging when I officially finish school, I promise.

The tree with Jamie's tree topper of choice -- a tobogan

The tree all lit up

The nativity scene under the tree

join the conspiracy

In light of a Christmas season that has already seen people trampled to death over the perfect gift or the best deal, I hope you will watch and consider this video and it's message. The concept of the advent conspiracy is simple:

[Worship fully]
[Spend less]
[Give more]
[Love all]

However, these simple ideas may be harder to put into practice. I know that when I am focused on getting the right thing for the right person and how that will affect me financially I have a much harder time worshiping fully and focusing on Jesus in the midst of the madness. This year, I pray that we will spend more time than money, give more love than gifts, and focus on Christ more than a holiday. Will you join the conspiracy??

For more information visit: http://www.adventconspiracy.org

thanksgiving

Above is a picture from my Thanksgiving dinner. This year, my celebration was a little different than in the past. Dinner with the fam was on Wednesday and we headed back to Morgantown yesterday because Jamie had to work and because our community group was having a Thanksgiving dinner for some of our homeless friends who live on the Rail Trail. It was a great celebration and one of the only Thanksgiving dinners where you could hear the quote, "There's a man up there who is becoming a woman. He has boobies." After dinner, we stuck around and played some cards, listened to some after dinner tunes courtesy of Larry (see pic below), talked, and spent a lot of time laughing. All in all, it was one of my more memorable Thanksgivings and the beauty of it was it didn't feel like charity, it didn't feel like a handout....it felt like family. The people you see in this picture are my friends and family, the folks I spend every Sunday with and who accept me exactly the way I am. And for that I am thankful...

Dinner buffet style :)

Larry serenading us after dinner

An intense game of cards...

these are my confessions

I have a confession: I have a jealousy problem... I have an attention-seeking problem... I have a pride problem. I think, well actually I know, this is something everyone struggles with. The thing about my pride is that it's so easy to hide. In the midst of my seeming humbleness I am often harboring thoughts like "Why does that person get all of the recognition?" "Why are they successful when I'm not?" "Why am I not talented like that person?" "Why?...."

The thing about pride and insecurities is that they seem to feed off each other. That seems counter-intuitive, but ultimately insecurities ARE pride because they cause us to focus on ourselves instead of God or others. And when I am consumed by my insecurities and pride, I get tunnel vision. I simply can't keep my focus on God when those things are in my sight line.

Being in med school has further complicated this struggle. It's difficult to be in an environment where you are constantly told that what you do isn't good enough. So when it comes to these feelings welling up my problem is always how to "shut it down" (Jess's favorite phrase). And the more I think about it, the more I think that thankfulness is a big part of the answer.

I have SO much to be thankful for and yet I constantly fall into the trap of wanting what others have. When I remind myself of the amazing blessings in my life, I see how silly my complaining is. When I think of extreme thankfulness like that of Job who said (after losing everything I might add) "The Lord gives and the Lord takes away, blessed be the name of the Lord" or Joseph who said (to his brothers who sold him into slavery) "You meant it for evil but God meant it for good," I realize that I have a lot to learn in the thankfulness arena. So this season, I hope you will join me in realigning my focus, in being thankful not only for what I have, but for what God has given others because I know that His ways are higher than mine and what He has given me, and them, is exactly what we need.

bullet point update

Well, Katy, is this random enough for you? Instead of doing 6 random things for the third time, thought I would give a quick bullet update as opposed to the intense posts as of late :)

• One of the shows I somehow find myself watching lately (usually on Saturday nights when I am studying and waiting for Jamie to get home from work) is 17 Kids and Counting. The name pretty much says it all, but as crazy as it seems to me to have 17 children and 1 on the way it is also very interesting to see this HUGE family living absolutely debt free...makes me reconsider my own financial situation.
• I love music but every now and then (like now) I go through these phases where I don't want to listen to any music because nothing seems to fit quite right...weird, but true.
• I tend to have a love/hate relationship with running and despite that fact that I am training for a half-marathon that I will be running on Jamie's 29th birthday (Jan. 18) I am currently in the hate phase...maybe it has something to do with my weird music phase and the fact that I can't seem to get distracted no matter what music I listen to. Or maybe it's just that it's so cold.
• "A Lot Like Love" is on TV right now and I had forgotten how much I like this movie and its soundtrack. The Aqualung song "Brighter Than Sunshine" is one of my faves and consequently is the ringtone that plays when Jamie calls me.
  
• Our puppy seems to love dirty laundry. Below is a pic of him in his current favorite napping spot, our laundry pile....now if only we could teach him to actually do laundry...
• 'Tis the season of pumpkin ice cream! Edy's brand is amazing and only in stores for a limited time so I highly recommend trying it.
  
• I am getting excited to decorate a "real" house for Christmas as opposed to an apartment. Hopefully we will be getting a real tree...YAY!

TGIF?

Fridays tend to be lonely for me as a Trooper’s wife. On the day that most people are having date nights, going out to dinner, going to the movies, etc. I am usually home alone studying. Adjusting to a schedule that coincides with Jamie’s has been a challenge, especially with the recent addition of Schroder to our lives. I am still working on whether to be productive during the day when Jamie isn’t working or to attempt to make myself nocturnal like my husband. I admit, I’m not sure what the balance should look like yet. It is a weird paradox because I often feel like I am still single as far as hang out time with friends, Friday and Saturday nights at home by myself, etc and yet I still don’t seem to be able to carve out much alone time for myself. I think it is because when Jamie is at work I have procrastinated studying and other things all day long so I feel like it is crunch time to get things done in the evenings.

I often daydream about what it would be like if Jamie and I both had “normal” schedules. I imagine how wonderful it would be for both of us to come home in the evenings and just spend time together instead of studying, working, going to a million meetings, or crashing from sheer exhaustion. But this is where God has us right now so instead of dreaming about what things could be like, we have to roll up our sleeves and work to make things mesh with our current schedules….easier said than done, but something that is worth working for. That’s the thing about marriage – it’s not a happy ending, but instead the beginning of a lot of hard work toward happiness and most of all, toward glorifying God together.

On that note….back to my Friday night of studying ;)

living in the shadows....

Warning: This blog contains actual excerpts from my journal so prepare for the transparency....

As the oldest sibling, I never expected to feel like I was living in the shadow of one of my sisters (yes, Tiff, I'm talking about you). Lately, though, I find a fairly unfamiliar feeling of....sibling rivalry? no...jealousy? maybe a little....inadequacy? maybe a lot....creeping up more and more. As much as I ADORE having Tiff in the same town as me, I can also feel the comparisons between us brewing. Maybe these are mostly in my head and are tied back to that feeling of inadequacy thing (which seems to be pervading so many areas of my life lately), but constantly hearing how awesome Tiffany is makes me feel distinctly un-awesome. Here's the thing... she is awesome...I whole-heartedly agree! But more and more I have begun to feel invisible in comparison.

The thing about living in the shadows is that it's easy to get lost there, to stay in the dark and have a pity party, and that's the opposite of what I want. I want to live in the light of Christ. I don't want to seek my worth in the opinions of others, but I can't lie, what others think (especially those who I am closest to and living in community with) matters to me. And as much as I want to seek my complete fulfillment in Christ alone, I am trying to balance that with our call to live in community, to encourage one another and to spur each other on to righteousness. Somehow I can't reconcile always feeling poured out and never feeling poured into with Christ's will for me. Maybe that's a flaw in my own logic but that's where I am right now....trying to navigate my way out of the shadows and find the light.

randomness...take 2

Well, once again I have been tagged for randomness....this time by Janine and Nicole both of whom are doing some amazing work in Kenya so check out their blogs as well as the Nuru website! Since Janine always wants update on my life, I will try to keep these more recent than my last random post.

1. My new favorite Starbucks treat is the Peppermint Mocha twist for a couple reasons: #1 It is very holiday-ish which I love #2 I actually hate coffee and for some reason Peppermint Mocha is the only coffee I can stand #3 it has fun whipped cream with some kind of pepperminty sprinkles.
2. I feel a little like Napoleon Dynamite these days because "my lips hurt real bad." As the temperature has decreased and winds have increased in the fall to winter transition my lips have become so cracked and dry. Guess I should just ask the school nurse for some chapstick....I'm sure she has like 5 sticks in her drawer ;)
   
3. I have been reading the gospels lately and have been noticing how much the word "immediately" is used, especially in the book of Mark. Still trying to flush out the significance of this but if you have any ideas or know about the word in the original language, please comment and share :)
4. Man, my abs are sore today from running a 3 mile hill run yesterday -- that's how out of shape I am....but, working in getting back in shape and training for a half-marathon in January.
5. Even though my birthday was 2 months ago, I still frequently forget how old I am. When people ask, I'm usually like, "26? Oh no, I mean 27!" Not sure how long it will take me to get used to being 27, but I'd say by that time I will probably be turning 28...
6. I think I must be one of the clumsiest people in the world (and I'm pretty sure Jamie would agree)....An example: The other day I was running around the house so the puppy would chase me (don't ask, he likes to play) and somehow managed to slide across the kitchen floor and fall into our dining room table and chairs, meanwhile hurling into the air the ketchup and mustard I was holding. The end result was me laying in the floor crying (have no idea why) and Schroder whining because he thought I was hurt. I bet it would have been hilarious to watch. Hopefully it will be on my blooper reel ;)
   

I am not going to tag anyone else because I think everyone I know has already been tagged and I can see this vicious cycle of tagging and re-tagging continuing on for eternity.

I do have to give Janine props for inspiring me to use the colorful blog posts. Never even knew I could do that until I saw her "coat of many colors" blog ;)

like a caged animal...

Those of you who read the last post know that Jamie and I just got a dog on Friday. He came from the pound where he was crated for most of the day (a good thing for us now since he is already crate trained). The interesting thing is that now that he has freedom to roam around most of the day and only be in his crate when we aren't here or are in bed, there are times when he would prefer to just go lay in his crate. It is familiar to him, his comfort zone.

As I was reflecting on this, I began to realize that it is much the same way we act in our walk with Christ. We are absolutely free in Him but often we prefer to stay in our cage of comfort and familiarity. What will happen if we branch out? What will happen if we take that first step of faith? What will happen if we run in complete freedom after God? What will happen if we let go of our fear of the unknown and instead live in the presence of the All-Knower?

Why do we continue to live in captivity instead of embracing our freedom?

I love how Charlie Hall describes our freedom in Christ in his song, "Chainbreaker":

You are free
You are free
Yeah the Son has set you free
Drop your chains
Sons and daughters
Come and run in liberty

Maybe we don't realize the power that is in our freedom, that it is something we should run to and rejoice in . We are free from so many things that chain others and yet we don't take advantage of: societal roles and classes, injustice, worry, death, despair...just to name a few. Isaiah puts it this way and Jesus affirms that this is the reason He came to earth:

The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me, because the LORD has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners,

to proclaim the year of the LORD's favor
and the day of vengeance of our God,
to comfort all who mourn,

and provide for those who grieve in Zion—
to bestow on them a crown of beauty
instead of ashes,
the oil of gladness
instead of mourning,
and a garment of praise
instead of a spirit of despair.
They will be called oaks of righteousness,
a planting of the LORD
for the display of his splendor.

Not only does Christ set us free, he exchanges the things that enslave us for so much more. Today, I pray that you live in the freedom Christ has given you and take full advantage of your crown of beauty, oil of gladess and garment of praise in times of mourning and despair. Because when we truly live in freedom, not only are we blessed, but we display the Lord's splendor to a world in chains.

new addition to the rickard family...

No, despite the current pregnancy craze among everyone I know, that's not the kind of addition I'm talking about....We got a dog! He is a rescue from the animal shelter named Schroeder and he's 10 weeks old. Check out all his cute-ness below:

unsettled

Big things are happening these days... exciting things, amazing things. They seem to be happening all around me to people I really care about and while I am so happy and excited for them, I can't help but feel a little twinge of... jealousy? desire? discontent? Here's the thing: I want to be doing something I really love, something I am passionate about and that I know is making an impact for Christ. The question I keep asking myself is: Is that where med school is going to get me or am I going to get to the end of this long process and wish I had done something else? I truly felt like this was where God was leading me and yet it is so hard and miserable and unenjoyable most of the time that it makes me wonder why God wouldn't call me to something that I really love. I know this life is about laying down my own life in order to pursue what God has for me (and maybe the misery is just part of class and not medicine itself) and yet it seems so much harder to lay down your life for endless studying, constant stress and missing out on so much time with friends and family than to lay it down for a big adventure. It seems harder to trust God's provision when you could just work and be equally dissatisfied than as when you are traveling across the world or getting to share with others something you are completely passionate about and sold out for. Maybe this is just a little discouragement talking or maybe everyone feels this way, but it is getting increasingly hard to miss out on things I do care about and enjoy to do something I don't and on top of it all, to continually question what my true strengths and gifts are and how they can be used. It is difficult to understand why God would take me away from something I was good at to do something I'm not so good at. I don't have any less confidence that God has a plan for me, I am just wondering and questioning what it is, which I think is all a part of the pursuing process. So here I am: pursuing, questioning, wondering, maybe wandering and trying to figure it all out, one step of faith at a time.

their welfare is ours

I have been reading Jeremiah lately and despite having a gnarly call (you can read about it but basically Jeremiah gets to deliver mostly bad news, is told by God not to pray for the people he is prophesying to and is threatened with death several times not to mention beaten and put in prison) he speaks the truth of God, no matter what the consequences. He is called to tell Israel that they would be going into exile in Babylon as punishment for their rebellion against God. Then, he is called by God to speak to those who are in exile and I think what he has to say is interesting:

"...seek the welfare of the city where I have sent you into exile, and pray to the Lord on its behalf, for in its welfare you will find your welfare." Jeremiah 29:7

God doesn't ask the Israelites to simply be content with the place He has sent them into exile, He asks them to INVEST there even while waiting for their return to their own country. This passage really hit me...How often am I content with where I am but looking ahead to what's next instead of taking time to invest in the place that God has put me? Even more importantly, how often am I investing in my city, in those outside my church or Christian community?

Lately, God has given me the privilege to witness the power of this type of investment. We (meaning members of my community and I) have taken advantage of the opportunity over the last several weeks to visit the Rail Trail here in Morgantown and just hang out with and get to know some of the people who call it or the Bartlett House their home. It started out with just a few of us, but as the group has grown it has been awesome just watching people fall in love with people. I think too often we separate ourselves from those who suffer because we don't know how to deal with the suffering. What I've learned from some of my friends on the Rail Trail is that, suffering or not, they just want to be treated as people instead of problems. While they appreciate the physical resources that are provided for them, they appreciate even more being able to tell their stories, voice their concerns and have people actually listen, invest, and care... And we should care...Why?

Because their welfare is ours.

Because their problems are ours.

Because their hurt is ours.

We simply cannot know the injustice and hurt that happens around us and not invest in the solution. And God asks us to invest in the place where He has put us, whether we like that place or not. The Israelites were asked to invest in their city of exile...Will you invest in your city?

hands and feet

God has been dealing with me a lot lately about the practicality of faith and about what role our works have in faith. It's a tough subject to wrap your mind around and I think I still have more questions than answers, to be honest. Like I said in my last post, I have been reading Shane Claiborne's book Irresistable Revolution (it's a great book but don't read it unless you are ready for it to ruin your life...in a good way...ha). There are so many aspects of the book I could talk about but one of the things that has hit me the hardest about it is a particular passage:

"I remember hearing about an old comic strip...Two guys are talking to each other, and one of them says he has a question for God. He wants to ask why God allows all of this poverty and war and suffering to exist in the world And his friend says, 'Well, why don't you ask?' The fellow shakes his head and says he is scared. When his friend asks why, he mutters, 'I'm scared God will ask me the same question.' Over and over, when I ask God why all of these injustices are allowed to exist in the world, I can feel the Spirit whisper to me, 'You tell me why we allow this to happen. You are my body, my hands, my feet.'"

Wow...That really shifts the responsibility doesn't it? So I have been contemplating what it looks like for me to be the hands and feet of Jesus in my particular situation and place in life. This is a huge struggle for me because I constantly want to be DOING something big for God. I want to be doing whatever it is He has for me, making a tangible and visible difference, living out a dream that God has given me and that I am passionate about, especially when I see other people in my life living the fulfillment of that (like my friend Janine....check out more at www.nuruinternational.org). And yet I can't help but wonder whether God is looking back at my frustration and saying "But what are you doing NOW? You want to do something tangible, so do it!" I think this is a trap so many of us fall into...We are pursuing and loving Christ and yet it doesn't seem to translate into our actions and thus our impact because we are waiting for THE thing God has for us instead of looking for what we can do now and realizing that THE thing that we are looking for may look different in every stage of our life. Again, I am still trying to flush this all out and I don't have all the answers, but what I do now is that I don't want to be a stagnant Christian. I don't want to get so caught up in my own life that I don't see the injustice, the poverty, the problems around me. And I want to do more than just profess Christ...I want to live Him.

brief update

So I am apparently a huge blogging slacker these days. Just wanted to give a brief update with more to follow soon hopefully :)

• My life has been pretty much swallowed up by school recently so if you haven't seen or heard from me that's why. On the upside, God is faithful and I have passed all of my tests thus far :)
• I am currently reading Irresistable Revolution by Shaine Claiborne and highly recommend it...more on that later.
• I got to go to Huntington to visit my youngest sister, Ashley, and her husband, Adam, this past weekend. It was great to see them and their house which is super cute!
• I am now officially 27 as of two weeks ago...eek...jk...feels just like 26 but I am including a pic of the hilarious cake my sister got for me. Look to the previous post if you don't understand why there is a trophy on it.
• I have been married for 2 months on Thursday and married life is great! Just wish sometimes that I had more time to spend with my husband instead of studying. And I think Jamie is still adjusting to my multi-tasking, hectic lifestyle...ha.
• God has been challenging me and teaching me some really cool things lately that I hope to blog about soon. Lately I have been struggling to see what, if any, impact my life is having for Christ and God is teaching me slowly what it looks like to be His hands of feet even in the midst of my crazy life.

That's all for now....More coming soon, I promise. Grace and peace!

maybe if i wasn't going commando ;)

Some of you might recognize this Friends reference from the episode where Joey decides to put on all of Chandlers clothes: "Look at me--I'm Chandler! Could I BE wearing any more clothes? Maybe if I wasn't going commando! " Well last night, our community group did something similar. We decided to put on as many clothes as we could and then donate those clothes to various people in need (some locally, some across the country, and some in Uganda). I am continually amazed at the awesome things that can happen when people with the same heart for God work in unity toward a common purpose. And on top of that, we had FUN. We even had a contest to see who had the most clothes on and of the 8 people who participated in the judging, we had over 200 items of clothing on! Overall, we collected a mountain of trash bags full of clothes, shoes, etc (see below)



...and the prize for the clothes-wearing contest was pretty sweet as well ;)

Me, all dressed up and looking like a sumo wrestler

Everyone dressed up

Maybe the funnest part was watching everyone attempt to get all the clothes OFF (most of them needed help and luckily Brittani didn't mind helping a bit ;)...which earned her the quote "Why is Brittani the designated stripper?")

Little did we know what surprise Derek had waiting for us ;)

All in all it was a great evening, with great people, for a great cause....what more could you ask for?

Tag...I'm it

My friend, Lauren tagged me and I am supposed to write 6 random things about myself. Luckily, this works out well for me because randomness is my favorite (as you can see from the pic of Janine and I above) :)

Here are the tagging rules:
1. Post the rules on your blog
2. Write 6 random things about yourself
3. Tag 6 people at the end of your post
4. If you're tagged, DO IT and pass on the tag


My random-ness:
1. One of my biggest fears is popping balloons....maybe because my grandma used to tell me the pieces would hit me in the eye and blind me??

2. I hate tomatoes but love ketchup, tomato sauce, salsa and even tomato basil soup...weird, I know.

3. The first career aspirations I had were to be a chocolate engineer....and I wanted my sister to be a snow engineer. I didn't know what an engineer was but I knew my dad was one...and I really liked chocolate (that part hasn't changed)

4. I hate ironing so much that when I was single and made a list of characteristics I would like in a future husband "can/will iron" was one of them :)

5. When I was young and used to spend the night with my grandparents (who read the Bible together every night....cute!), they would let me pick a passage from the Bible for them to read to me and I always picked the story of the rich man and Lazarus from Luke 16....it was my favorite....I have no idea why.

6. I have the hardest time spelling Philippians. I always want it to have two L's and one P for some reason: Phillipians....I know it doesn't look right and yet every time I try to write it I try to put the two L's in.



I am tagging:
1. Andrea Salamonca -- love your randomness anyway!
2. Katy Whitehair -- because she may be one of the only people that reads this blog...ha
3. Billy Williams -- gettin' the guys involved :)
4. Meghan Baird -- because she's a cool chick whose blog I just discovered and we're almost birthday twins
5. Angela Harding -- because she just rocks
6. Janine Dzuba -- great way to start your blog!

thriller

First look at the Thriller dance from the wedding! Thanks to the Hatfields for posting it :)

these are apparently my celeb lookalikes....what i do when i am avoiding studying

MyHeritage: Family trees - Genealogy - Celebrities - Collage - Morph

a woman's worth

I think as women the most common way that Satan attacks us is by attacking our self worth. Maybe this is the same for men but I'm not one so I don't know. It breaks my heart to see this happening to so many of the amazing women I know. Satan loves to plant doubts and questions into our minds (and too often they get incorporated into our hearts and into the view we have of ourselves): Am I a good enough friend? daughter? sister? coworker? student? girlfriend? wife? mom? Christian? AM I GOOD ENOUGH? As I was meditating on this issue, it brought to mind a passage from Sex God by Rob Bell that speaks so much truth about our worth and value -- which comes completely from Christ and not from ourselves:

"Do you realize?

You don’t need a man by your side to validate you as a woman. You already are loved and valued. You’re good enough exactly as you are. Do you believe this? Because it’s true. You have limitless worth and value. If you embrace this truth, it will affect every area of life... YOU ARE WORTH DYING FOR. Your worth does not come from your body, your mind, your work, what you produce, what you put out, how much money you make...You have inestimable worth that comes from your creator. You will continue to be tempted in a thousand different ways to not believe this. The temptation will be to go searching for your worth and validity from places other than your creator. Especially from men.[Tara's note: or I would argue from other people in general] ...You are already loved. Your strength is a beautiful thing. And when you carry yourself with honor and dignity that are yours, it forces the men around you to relate to you on more than just a flesh level. YOU ARE WORTH DYING FOR."

This passage speaks more specifically about male-female relationships but it's truths apply universally. Yes, as women we often look for validation from men, but we also look for validation from other women and unfortunately women can be some of the harshest critics of other women. What hurts my heart most is that we as Christians are often responsible for bringing down others instead of building them up. Maybe it's our own internalized self-worth questions and strive for perfection that we impart on others, but it is Christ's heart that we would see each other (and ourselves!) through Him -- as invaluable and worth dying for -- and act accordingly, by living in a way that reflects and honors that value in both ourselves and others.

mrs. rickard

well, it's been a little over 2 weeks since the wedding so at least i'm not as late on this one as uganda, but i am proud (and completely blessed) to announce that i am now officially mrs. rickard. overall, i am constantly amazed at God's hand in bringing jamie and i together and still blown away from time to time knowing that i am married to such an awesome, godly man and that God truly was working everything out for my good even in the times when i didn't recognize it.

now on to the actual day.....after all the stress and planning, i am happy to say that the wedding day was completely awesome and everything seemed to come together really well. i didn't sleep much the night before (partially due to excitement and partially due to a huge storm) but i woke up to a house full of awesome girls (my bridesmaids) and bagels (thanks to tiff) so that started my morning off right. my first act of the day, besides a shower, was getting my hair done so we'll start there...

first of all, let me say that getting my hair done was completely fun (other than the 83 bobby pins jammed into my head...yes, we counted them that night when we took them out of my hair)....you can probably tell why since this is the picture of my stylist, David and i at the practice run...

and though my hair looked like this for a while:
the finished product turned out great


the rest of the morning basically consisted of running around like crazy trying to get everything (the reception location) and everyone ready. it was during this time that i found out jamie's phone had been confiscated because he was trying to send me a text so i wouldn't be able to communicate with him at all until the actual wedding (kent apparently took the not seeing each other before the wedding thing to a whole new level).... i did however get a wedding gift delivery, which was an awesome SLR digital camera (the Canon Rebel XTi for those you camera people)...don't i have a great husband?

after much waiting around and killing time by practicing the thriller dance, it was time for the big moment....

me walking down the aisle with my dad:

this is apparently jamie's face when he first saw me (thanks ashley for snapping this one!)
pouring the unity sand...
the big kiss.....(and probably the only time you will catch me with a "kissing picture")
and introducing mr. & mrs. jamie rickard...

a few of my favorite moments from the ceremony:

• when i got down the aisle and was just looking at jamie while standing with my dad and he mouthed "i love you".... great memory
• praying with jamie right after communion.
  

after the ceremony and pictures it was on to the fun of the reception....

our cake
it got a little messy....

after the crying during the toasts (mostly thanks to tiffany) it was time for some dancing....

both serious (our first dance)
and fun (thriller)

i think the thriller dance went pretty well but i haven't seen the video yet so who knows?....it was definitely fun though and there was apparently an encore performance at the after party at bent willey's.

after much fun...(including the mom dance below)
it was time for us to leave (or at least fake leave for the camera)

the real depature involved my first time riding in a limo (which was stinkin' awesome)

the best part of the day (besides marrying jamie of course!) was being able to spend it with those we love.....we are so blessed to have an amazing family (both blood and in Christ) and it was awesome to get to share the beginning of this new adventure with them. the people i missed so much on that day were my grandparents, especially my grandma....she wanted me to get married more than anything so i know that she would have been overjoyed to be there, but instead she got to watch it all with our Matchmaker, which is even cooler.

to see more pics from the day click here and enter the password: TheRickards

a pictorial tour of my time in uganda

Just wanted to share a few (of the many) pictures I have from Uganda with some helpful captions ;) At the moment videos aren't uploading on my slow (and "borrowed") internet so those will have to wait I guess.


A couple of the boys getting water from the only source for the entire orphanage -- this tap.

The kids are super excited because Dan & Deb (2 of the other volunteers) bought the remaining mattresses that STAO needed so that each child could have one of their own.

These are the kids at the displacement camp we went to that literally followed Deb & I around the ENTIRE time.

The kids LOVE LOVE LOVE dancing.


This is the kids attempting to teach me how to dance and me finding out I have Mzungu (white girl) rhythm.

This is pretty much what happened every time you tried to take a picture....lots of excitement and hands in the camera :)

Asanat....love this girl...she taught me lots of Lugandan

Me with the other volunteers at the Nile: (R to L) Dan, Zech, me and then Deb in front


Cute! That's all I have to say...

Pastor Nelson and Deb doing laundry the Ugandan way


Hope you guys enjoy now that I'm officially back on the blogging train :)

uganda

As the red dirt stains on my feet begin to fade and I slowly get used to fast-paced life back in the States, I am finally finding time to process my trip and blog about it. The most common request since I have been back is "Tell me about Uganda." I have been so tempted just to answer, "Well, it is a small country in eastern Africa...." because there is no way to capture the experience in just a few sentences. The trip was nothing like I expected. Maybe I should start there. My expectations were high, as you might have guessed from my previous blogging. I wanted to be in love with every moment of the experience, to feel like I was truly connected to my passion and heart and to be absolutely enamored with Africa. Was that how I felt all of the time? No. Some of the time? Yes. In reality, living at an orphanage in Uganda for 2 weeks was a huge adjustment. Not only did I have to get used to my "toilet" being a hole in the ground and my "shower" being a bucket and a cup, I was surrounded by 70 kids almost 24-7 with very little privacy or alone time. Talk about incarnation ministry. I was homesick, I was physically sick, I had both ups and downs, discouragements and absolutely joyous moments, but all in all, God taught me so much and then commissioned me to come back and share it with all of you.

I'm going to be honest, putting the experience into words is going to be tough and I think that is why I have waited so long to do it. All in all, I came away with a sense of how truly blessed I am and how much I take that for granted at times. To see children who eat at most 2 meals a day (sometimes none depending on monetary support) be so joyous and in love with life was truly a wake up call. However, the fact that I am much more blessed monetarily than most, no all, of those people I came in contact with in Uganda was also a huge source of isolation for me. Being a "Mzungu" (white person) was not easy. Though it made me (and the other Westerners that were there to volunteer at the same time as me) very recognizable, it also made us targets not only for begging but also bitterness. While it was difficult to have so many people asking for money that you knew you couldn't help, it was even more difficult to realize the perceptions people had about us just because of the color of our skin. Even those that we grew the closest to told us that they believed that we inherently thought we were better than them and more deserving of blessings in life because of where we were from. It was nice to have a totally honest conversation like that and break down some of the misconceptions but disheartening to know that they existed in the first place.

I don't mean to dwell on the negative, just want to give a transparent picture of what I experienced. So time for some of the highlights of the trip:

• I got to float along in the NILE River and see it's source in Uganda....amazing!
• I got to learn one of my favorite songs ("I Surrender All") in Lugandan (the local language in Mafubira)
• Seeing the amazing reliance on prayer, especially in regards to healthcare, and tangibly seeing those prayers answered....For example, one of the girls at the orphanage, Eron, got VERY sick (with typhoid AND malaria) and had to be taken to the hospital...When the other kids found out, they immediately went to the church at the orphanage and began praying, even though it was probably 9 or 10pm. I don't know exactly how long they prayed because I was at the hospital but they definitely prayed without ceasing and God answered and brought Eron home safely after only a brief hospital stay.
• The AWESOME worship. Church lasted 4 hours each Sunday but it didn't feel like it because we were up dancing and singing and absolutely praising God with all that we had....and loving every minute of it!
• And last, but not least by any means -- the amazing amazing people that I met. From those with a heart to run this ministry, to all the awesome kids, to the volunteers that were there with me, God truly surrounded me with people with His heart and my experience wouldn't have been the same without them.

Lastly, I just wanted to share a few verses that God put on my heart during and upon reflecting on the trip:

"Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world." James 1:27
-- This is one of STAO's mission verses and completely embodies their calling and the calling that all of us have in one way or another.

"Has not God chosen those who are poor in the eyes of the world to be rich in faith and to inherit the kingdom He promised to those who love Him?" James 2:5
--I was so reminded of this verse every time I went to church and saw the heart of worship of all the people around me. They couldn't have been more rich in faith and I think it is because of their complete reliance on God as provider that sometimes our STUFF gets in the way of.

Sorry this is so long. Think I'll post a whole separate blog with more pics and videos. Otherwise, if there is anything specific you want to know about the trip or the situation in Uganda, please please don't hesitate to ask because I would LOVE to share anything I know or have experienced with you. Grace and peace :)

yep....i'm still alive

just wanted you all to know that i am indeed still in existence, although you wouldn't know it from this blog. been a pretty busy life since i last posted and i think i really haven't written because i have been trying to process all that i want to say about my trip to Uganda, but a brief update on life before i more extensive blog (with pictures and everything -- i promise!):

1. i am now officially mrs. rickard -- got married on August 2 and officially changed my name yesterday .... more to come on that front

2. just got back from our honeymoon in jamaica which was amazing -- loved every minute and couldn't have asked for a more perfect time

3. i start 2nd year of med school monday (what?! where did the summer go??) so prayers are appreciated for that

well those are the big things that have happened and i promise more details about those above and Africa very very soon :)

let the adventure begin

Well guys, I'm leaving for Uganda tomorrow....eek....kinda crazy! Wish I had more time to blog about what all I'm feeling but suffice it to say that I am excited but also very nervous. I would appreciate your prayers and keep checking here because I will either be updating on my journey or definitely when I get back. God bless!

heaven on earth

This morning, I was reading in 2 Samuel and 1 Chronicles the part about David wanting to build a temple for the ark of God. In this passage, David says "Here I am, living in a palace of cedar, while the ark of the covenant of the LORD is under a tent." David recognizes the inequity between his dwelling and the dwelling place of God and wants to do something about it. That concept really got me thinking. How many of us are concerned about the inequity between our abundance and blessing and that of the current dwelling place of God, the current temple of the Lord .... His people.

Lately, Jamie and I have also been reading "Velvet Elvis" by Rob Bell. If you haven't read it, I highly recommend it....so much good stuff in there (which I will probably be blogging about sporadically). But this morning, as I was reading "Velvet Elvis," God reiterated the lesson above for me. In the book, Rob Bell is talking about heaven and how it is not a future place, but a reality here and now for those who are believers. Here is an excerpt from what he says:

"Jesus said that as this new reality takes over our hearts and lives and minds and actions, we are crossing over 'from death to life.' He called this new kind of life 'eternal life.' For Jesus, eternal life wasn't a state of being for the future that we would enter into somewhere else; it is a quality of life that starts now....

When we choose God's vision of who we are, we are living as God made us to live. We are living in the flow of how we are going to live forever. This is the life of heaven, here and now. As we live this life, in harmony with God's intentions for us, the life of heaven becomes more and more present in our lives. Heaven comes to earth...

Now if there is a life of heaven and we can choose it, then there's also another way. A way of living out of sync with how God created us to live. The word for this is hell: a way, a place, a realm absent of how God desires things to be. We can bring heaven to earth; we can bring hell to earth...

When people use the word hell, what do they mean? They mean a place, an event, a situation absent of how God desires things to be. Famine, debt, oppression, loneliness, despair, death, slaughter -- they are all hell on earth.

Jesus' desire for his followers is that they live in such a way that they bring heaven to earth.

What's disturbing then is when people talk more about hell after this life than they do about hell here and now. As a Christian, I want to do what I can to resist hell coming to earth. Poverty, injustice, suffering -- they are all hells on earth, and as Christians we oppose them with all our energies. Jesus told us to."

So to follow Christ, to live the life of heaven on earth, to take care of God's current temple, we must be concerned about others, about injustice, about using the resources that God has blessed us with (whether it be gifts, talents, material blessings, prayer) to oppose hell on earth.

I am so thankful for those of you who are already doing this, who are bringing heaven to earth here and now. I have been able to see it so clearly lately in people rallying behind me to help prepare for my trip to Uganda. It has been amazing to see people pour out generously to support me financially, to encourage me spiritually and to meet a need STAO has by getting a laptop for their use. (Seriously, thanks guys....I think I have been offered 5 laptops at this point!) Though I know many of you can't go and would want to, please know that a piece of you will be going with me...through your prayers, your financial support, and your love. Thanks for helping me attempt to bring heaven to earth :)

leaping...

So, I did something scary yesterday (no not skydiving -- a little different type of leap). I booked my ticket for Uganda. This was (and still is!) scary for two reasons: #1 -- it means I am actually going and #2 -- I booked the ticket only having about half as much money as I need to pay for it. It did feel a little bit like I would imagine skydiving does, jumping into the unknown....guess that's why they call it a leap of faith. The thing is, this is something I have to do. Despite my apprehension recently about this trip (mostly due to its proximity to my wedding), I realized that all of my doubts and fears were coming from ME not God. I promised God I would pursue this dream until He closed the door or told me not to -- and He hasn't. So here I am taking a huge leap, knowing that God WILL provide. My part is to pursue God's will to the best of my ability... pretty sure He can handle the rest ;). As Nelson (the pastor in charge of STAO says): "He has a thousand cattles on a thousand hills. He is going to sell one for you."

a place to live

Many of you know that Jamie and I have been looking at houses for about 6 months now, first just for me to live in and then (post-engagement) a house for us once we get married. Well, I am happy to say after many frustrations, stumbling blocks and disappointments, God has provided us with a place to live :). Pending inspections and all those house buying loopholes, this will be our house:
Here are a few other pictures of the inside of the house:







I am excited to be able to move in, paint and make this house our own. Even more than that I am excited to have a place where we will actually have enough room to open our home to others. It will be nice to live in a place that doesn't share walls with anyone else and doesn't feel like being trapped in a box. Although this house wasn't our first (or second or third...ha) choice, I know that God has us in this house for a reason and I am so thankful for His provision of not only shelter but everything I have ever needed and abundantly more. So feel free to come visit, come stay, come hang out (after our June 30 closing date of course) -- and for those of you in Morgantown or close by, stay tuned for a house warming party :)